Who We Are

On January 25, 2016 I woke up at 4:40 a.m. with a very uneasy feeling. I had no idea where this feeling was coming from, just that it was stopping me from being able to sleep. Later that day I had learned that my son Junior was murdered at 4:51 a.m., 11 minutes after I had woken up. My husband and other son Matthew came to find me at work to tell me what happened because I was not answering my phone. I remember the total denial and shock that overtook my thought process. I could not understand what I was being told, nor did I believe it. It became debilitating to continue on with mundane daily tasks. The grief was powerful, my mind sometimes creating new stories that would get me through the day. I would get in my car to drive around looking for Junior and telling myself he is going to come back. Once the trial was over, I asked the detective “is Junior going to come out now?” because in my mind he was able to come back after the trial is over, the detective had to explain that my son was gone.  Although it had been years, I still believed that he would come back to me. Every day was such a struggle to get up, I was constantly blaming myself for not being able to save him. I felt that when I woke up at 4:40 a.m. it was the warning I did not heed. I began to isolate myself overcome by the feelings of grief.

January 25^th, 2016 is the day that brought the organization together. Going back to that day, I remember the confusion and despair I experienced. We went to the Police Department where they provided me with the information of my son’s murder. They had done their job and had finished for the day, but for me it was not over. My family and I were lost about what to do and where to go. My husband, my son Matthew, and myself discussed how we wanted to help other people not to feel the way that we did.  My other son Matthew had passed from his pediatric cancer, but this organization was our mission to help other families heal. Although he is no longer with us Matthew’s spirit and determination are very much alive within this organization. We want to provide resources for families who have to experience losing a loved one in this tragic way.

Our goal is to provide the families, police departments, and other areas with resources. Supporting the families is our ultimate goal which includes going to trial with them, explaining the process, and help them answer any questions they may have. Advocacy is really important for the victims’ families and we aim to help them find their voice. We also serve as a buffer between families and police to help unify our efforts to getting the answers needed. We help families organize vigils for their families on the anniversary of their loved one’s death to spread awareness in our communities. Our team helps produce and distribute fliers to the community to keep them updated on events and information. The support of the community is so needed for these tragic times, these senseless murders affect us all beyond just the families. One of the biggest pillars of our organization is mental health. This magnitude of this type of loss can be debilitating and takes a toll on the families mentally. We provide resources for families to receive counseling for grief that can be so complex. Financial issues add stress to an already grieving family, it makes their situation much more difficult. Our goal is to raise money to help with expenses of funerals, counseling services, legal services, and wellness programs that can help bring healing. September 25^th is National Day of Remembrance for Homicide Victims which we had a water lantern release. We honored all the victims from different families in the community at a table with their pictures. It was a beautifully moving event that the families appreciate. We want to provide more experiences like this for them. Currently, I am working with East Chicago and Gary police departments to provide Christmas trees with each child of homicide whose family would like to participate will have an ornament for them up. We also have an ornament available for $5 that donates to the organization for the families. Holidays are one of the toughest times for families to endure and I wish to let them know they are not alone.

Junior always defended other people, he always stuck up for people who had trouble standing up for themselves. His kind heart is what inspired this organization. We want to be there for people who need support during their most tragic parts of life. We are passionate about being advocates for people who are having trouble expressing their needs. Junior and Matthew were two of the most loving souls to know. Circle of Love is rooted and upheld by their memory. Although they are not here physically my boys will continue to touch the lives of others through the work Circle of Love does to support the community of homicide victims.